The Best Strategies For Dealing With Loss

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Loss affects everyone differently. It would be a mistake to think that you’re supposed to follow a pre-planned routine once you experience it. That’s because while dealing with loss is sometimes expected, other times it isn’t. Either way, you cannot command your emotions or thoughts at such a time.

Don’t chastise yourself for feeling one way or another. There are ways to react to this difficult set of emotions (or feelings of numbness) through a healthy or destructive pattern.

Does that mean staying inside all weekend with your partner watching Harry Potter and eating ice cream? That might not be the healthiest approach physically. However, sometimes we do need that comfort. It provides a sense of nurturing to overcome very difficult emotions.

This post takes a similarly friendly, warm perspective and discusses some of the best strategies for dealing with loss. If you’ve experienced loss, you have my best wishes and sympathies I hope the following advice assists you.

For more advice, read the #1 bestseller: Navigating Intense Grief – How to Recover from a Devastating Loss: A Trusted Companion Guide with Proven Tools for Overcoming Deep Pain, Handling Emotional Waves, and Finding Transformative Healing.

Table of Contents

Just Feel What You Feel, Without Judgement

Grief shows up in so many different ways. You might feel intense sadness one moment, anger the next, and then nothing at all for a while. All of this is completely normal. There’s no right or wrong way to feel after losing someone important to you. It might be that this is the first time you’ve felt such a loss before. Each time is unique of course, so it’s not something you just “get used to” either.

Some emotions can even feel positive which may feel confusing. For example, if a relative has undergone a long period of illness and struggle, you may feel a sense of relief that they’re not longer in pain. That might make you feel a little guilty, even though it shouldn’t, but again, you should accept that feeling. You might even find that you laugh hard thinking about the memories you shared with that person. And that’s wonderful, even if it feels odd at the time. Grief isn’t linear, and it doesn’t follow a tidy schedule, so just let yourself go through that process.

woman in black and white polka dot hijab crying The Best Strategies For Dealing With Loss

Don’t Bottle It Up

The temptation to push emotions down and carry on as if everything’s fine can be strong. It might work in the short term, but those unprocessed emotions will generally sit and wait for you. They might show up as physical symptoms, sleep problems, or come flooding back when you least expect them. It’s one thing to be strong, perhaps for your children, but another to not let yourself heal.

Talking helps more than most people realize. This could mean confiding in a close friend, joining a support group, or seeing a therapist. Even speaking your thoughts aloud when you’re alone can provide some relief, as can writing it down. The simple effort of putting feelings into words helps your brain process what’s happened. Even coloring books can provide relief.

Tell Your Workplace & Friends

People often worry about bringing personal troubles into professional spaces. However, letting your workplace know what you’re going through serves a practical purpose. Most employers would rather know why your performance might be affected than wonder what’s wrong.

You don’t need to share every detail. A simple explanation that you’ve experienced a loss and might need some flexibility for a while usually suffices. You may even get leave for a few days or more if the relative was close to you. There isn’t a worthwhile boss out there who will make you feel bad for this.

The same goes for friends who might not know what’s happened. You shouldn’t feel obligated to explain yourself to everyone, but letting your close circle know helps them support you appropriately. They’ll all want to help and check in. It’s okay to be grateful. But you can also say you need a little time to yourself.

a person placing white roses on a concrete surface The Best Strategies For Dealing With Loss

Engage With The Process & Say Your Goodbyes

Finding ways to say goodbye helps our minds accept what’s happened. It’s also good to get closure. You won’t be completely over it with it then, but it’ll help you feel a little less fragmented. Traditional rituals like funerals serve this purpose, but personal goodbyes, however you think appropriate are fine as well.

You may personally find comfort in visiting special places you shared with your loved one. Or, you might write letters expressing things you wish you’d said. The form doesn’t matter as much as the intention behind it. It’s about accepting the reality of the loss. It’s also about your connection to the person.

Some people may even wish to go a little further. They might run a half-marathon in the name of the person they loved and lost. They could also contribute to a fundraiser for charity. Some even invest, perhaps putting community money together for Mausoleums & Crypts by Memorials.com for an incredible and timeless reminder of them. This is all wonderful, so don’t dismiss it.

Once You Have Energy, Focus On A Project

At some point, you’ll likely feel ready for gentle re-engagement with life. At this time, small projects are good to rebuild a sense of routine. This might be organizing photos, planting a garden, volunteering, or perhaps starting a new instrument at a gentle pace.

But why do this now? Well, it’s good to focus your mind on something active that isn’t just hard work. Gardening, for example, is a good idea, especially if you want to replant for this seasonal period.

Activities provide structure when the days otherwise feel empty and give you a sense of achievement during a time when so much feels beyond your control. They also offer natural breaks from grief. These breaks don’t require you to “move on” completely. But they can feel like a life raft in some circumstances.

woman standing on the cliff The Best Strategies For Dealing With Loss

Get Out In Nature

Nature has a very real way of putting human experiences into perspective. That’s not to say it makes you realize the loss of your loved one is no big deal. Of course not. After all, this is the most real thing one could ever go through in terms of impact. But there’s something about being in a calm nature area that helps you feel relaxed and soothed.

Don’t worry, you don’t need to plan an epic hike. Just going for a simple walk in a local park, sitting beside a stream, or even feeling the sun on your face can shift your emotional state. Nature has been proven to reduce our stress too. It’s not some strange pseudoscience. You’ll also find getting out there can help you feel more connected instead of worried.

Dealing With Loss Can Be A Healthier Turning Point

Loss can shake us up all over, and that doesn’t always have to be negative. It can inspire some very deep thinking in us, for obvious reasons. Of course, this doesn’t mean the loss itself was positive, but rather that it might clarify what truly matters to you.

It’s not uncommon for people to find themselves reconsidering priorities, relationships, or life directions after a major loss. You might feel drawn to simplify your life, work on getting rid of your bad habits and vices, or just try to be a better person, emulating the one you appreciated so much. Maybe you always valued their honesty and openness, and want to be more like that as a testament to them.

There is no rush to find meaning. There is no rush to make changes. Do not think this is some self-help book you work on or a checklist to meet. For some, this aspect of grief emerges years later, even. However, some people really do find themselves more productive when they allow a loss to change them as it should.

Even if you just try to be kinder and less judgmental, that’s a lovely win. Don’t think using the loss of someone in this way is an insult either. Imagine knowing that someone felt your loss so deeply. They used your example to try and be a better person. They became more vulnerable and more open. That’s perhaps one of the best compliments and tributes to love anyone could receive.

woman comforting friend The Best Strategies For Dealing With Loss

Cherish & Connect With Your Loved Ones

There’s nothing that can have you talking to family members you may have disconnected from quite like dealing with loss. It’s common to feel a desire to connect more deeply with family and friends. You want to say what matters while you can.

That’s not a false desire that comes from worry, it’s just realizing what does actually matter. Perhaps it’s time to apologize to a sibling you’ve fallen out with. You could start talking to them again. Or perhaps it’s time to invite an old friend somewhere.

Loss doesn’t necessarily mean everything is fine with everyone. You may have had very good reasons to come away. But where you can, letting bygones be bygones isn’t a bad response to an experience like this. It can help you build a new chapter in life.

With this advice, I hope you found strategies for dealing with loss. You can, with time, let it alter you for the better. Don’t worry about how long it takes to get there.